COWBOY POETRY: Dumpster Diving

My missing tooth, right where I smile, had caused me so much grief. No one looked me in the eye. They’d rather check my teeth.

So, I called my favorite dentist. Yes, the one who made the hole. Who charged me half a pay check. Now I’m broke. Well bless his soul.

That day my dentist found a tooth just right for this old mouth. He said he’d pulled it early from a patient who went south.

Did I hear my dentist say that he had pulled it from the dead? I had to stop the nitrous. It was messing with my head.

I muffled out the words. “Please hold the nitrous for a while.” The dentist held a mirror and said, “Let’s check out your new smile.”

He said, “Your tooth is really meant for superficial use. You’ll take it out when eating. It can’t handle harsh abuse.”

I shook his hand and thanked him. Then said, “Put it on my bill.” I’m sure I heard “Ka Ching” or maybe, “Sure as heck I will!”

I’d only had my tooth for just an hour or maybe two. When I stopped to eat a burger, pulled my tooth so I could chew.

I finished up my lunch and threw the garbage in the can. Then I walked into Cabela’s like a most important man.

But something sure was missing. Then it hit me like a flash. I’d gathered up my brand-new tooth and thrown it in the trash.

So, I turned to dumpster diving. I just had to find my tooth. When a lady handed me a Ten. Said, “Hope you’ll find God’s truth.”

I didn’t give a second look. I’d dang near lost all hope. And then I saw my brand-new tooth stuck to a bar of soap.

So, that day I learned two lessons. Keep your teeth out of the trash and start up dumpster diving. You could make some extra cash!

Free News Delivery by Email

Would you like to have the day's news stories delivered right to your inbox every evening? Enter your email below to start!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.